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- Best Relationship Advice "Build Me Up Buttercup" The Foundations, 1968
Best Relationship Advice "Build Me Up Buttercup" The Foundations, 1968
by LaDena Kailing Garr, Certified Life Coach since 2011 (Your Romance Fulfillment Leader)
LaDena Kailing Garr
January 21, 2026
Fun fact, find the answer at the bottom of this email.
In 1998 a box office hit movie featured this song. What movie was it?
Feel-Good Relationship Advice from the Greatest Love Songs!
I need you more than anyone Darlin’
For those who have experienced unrequited love
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Read time: 5 minutes
Lyrics
Why do you build me up (build me up) Buttercup, baby
Just to let me down (let me down) and mess me around
And then worst of all (worst of all) you never call, baby
When you say you will (say you will) but I love you still
I need you (I need you) more than anyone, darlin'
You know that I have from the start
So build me up (build me up) Buttercup, don't break my heart
American Songwriter states that the song is know for its’ cheerful sound contrasting with lyrics about unrequited love. In the song, he needs her. He pleads not to have his heart broken. But in matters of love, it takes two to tango, and, well, she, whoever Buttercup is, just doesn’t seem interested at this time.
According to “Words about music” music criticism at HWS; “Build Me Up Buttercup” is suspended between two conflicting ideas, in many aspects. Not only is the upbeat music at odds with the downbeat lyrics, there is also dissonance between what the narrator says he feels, and how the lyrics imply he could feel otherwise. The song also flutters between originality and imitation as the song presents influences of pimarily ska and soul.
Whatever the songs intentions, it elicits joy and nostalgia to most listeners. I’m here for it!
Whenever I feel blue I play this song, and then the hope and warmth flow again..!
Buttercup as a term of endearment
You may be familiar with the phrase "cheer up, buttercup"being told to those who are sad or upset. Aside from being used as a term of endearment, a buttercup is a bright yellow wildflower which can be correlated to one being sweet, jubilant and bright in spirit.
Lyrics
"I'll be over at ten", you told me time and again
But you're late, I wait around and then (bah-dah-dah)
I went to the door, I can't take anymore
It's not you, you let me down again
(Hey, hey, hey!) Baby, baby, try to find
(Hey, hey, hey!) A little time and I'll make you happy
(Hey, hey, hey!) I'll be home
I'll be beside the phone waiting for you
Ooo-oo-ooo, ooo-oo-ooo
Can you relate to these lyrics of love that was not returned? For those of us old enough, do you remember waiting at home beside the phone, just in case they called? Those lyrics, although they were painful in the actual moment, today they make me smile. They represent the glorious agony of wishful thinking!
According to Dianne Grande Ph.D. in her article “Unrequited Love” featured in Psychology Today, Ask yourself, “How does this love serve me?” “Am I avoiding the risk of rejection that comes with mutual love?” For some individuals who repeatedly experience unrequited love, self-esteem is suffering in a way that leads the person to feel essentially unlovable. Staying in a relationship in which the affection isn’t returned confirms the false belief that one is unlovable.
The next steps are directed at self-compassion. Whether or not you see a repetitive pattern, you are likely having a difficult time and putting a lot of your energy into thinking about someone else, rather than your own well-being.
Every morning I start my day with my “hour of power”, quiet time dedicated to getting my heart, mind and spirit on the right track. This process is something my mentor taught me 16 years ago, using my time for deep meditation and sincere prayer. This helps me channel and share energy in the most important areas of my life; romance, friendships, health, creativity, finances, and spiritual growth.
In 2022 I learned that our Theta brainwaves create a powerful flow state and can be activated using a sound wave. I’ve been using Genius Wave effectively since then. Below are the affiliate links that will educate you about the process.
If you’re curious you can learn more here:
Genius Wave/Genius Song
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The Money Wave
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Anytime we are defending ourselves, or trying too hard, or becoming too obsessive about something it is because we are trying to control it. It’s because we really don’t trust that the Divine knows what it’s doing.
Think about this…
What did you learn from your experiences in unrequited love?
Why do you think most of us need to go through an experience such as this?
Do you believe it helped prepare you for a love that is reciprocated and appreciated?
It’s not always easy to know what to say to generate deeper conversations and intimacy with your sweetheart. That’s why I’ve created 4 conversation starters to strengthen your romance. You can get your free guide, as well as the details to the Remarkable Romance Program available now: remarkable-romance-program.teachable.com/p/remarkable-romance-program
Key Take Aways
A song with sad lyrics can still have such positive music, that it soothes the soul.
One way relationships are not built to last.
Fun Fact Trivia:
In 1998 this song was featured in a hit movie. What movie was it?
Answer: “There’s something about Mary”
Plus a free guide, 4 comfortable conversation starters to strengthen your romance by LaDena Kailing Garr, CLC in partnership with the late Mark Kailing, PsyD, Helping adults who are aching for a RICH, REWARDING, REMARKABLE ROMANCE in life! We invest in what we value the most. I help busy, overwhelmed adults in loving relationships, who feel their romantic connection has become routine, go from feeling taken for granted and emotionally distant to experiencing exciting intimacy, deeper connection and romance fulfillment. This transformation ensures they thrive with support, enduring romantic expression, and enriching their overall life satisfaction. |
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The Remarkable Romance Program (online course via video lessons) |
Love is the greatest adventure!
~LaDena, Your Romance Fulfillment Leader
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